Life Dreaming

There are days when even a small dream looks too hard.

I’ve had one of those days.

I woke up through the night from strange dreams [and I have really strange ones!] and then woke this morning feeling slightly ill.

My gut hurt and I was feeling all stuffed up and I had a ‘feeling’ – one of those intuitions.

I actually said to myself ‘something’s about to happen and I’m not gonna like it’.

So, I just slowed down and had a cuppa and went quiet for a while.

The phone rang and someone left a message. It was my credit union telling me that I needed to pay them money and while they knew people were suffering in this depression [I refuse to call it a recession] would I get it sorted.

Well folks, you can’t make money appear from nowhere.

My business like many others in Ireland has totally suffered as a result of the economic times and while I’m doing a lot of things to remedy the situation – I’m not a miracle worker. It’s been tough financially for a few years [and amazing in other ways].

So what did I do?

I let myself feel shitty for a few minutes and then:

• emailed the credit union manager and explained my financial situation again. I told him that I couldn’t meet their demands now but was working on it.
• emailed my sister and let off steam and had a cry
• emailed my brother Marc and moaned
• thought about the work I was doing to create something I love
• affirmed that I was committed to paying the credit union and they would just have to be patient
• balanced my stressed thoughts about money with thoughts about all the things in my life that were amazing – my friends and family, coco dog, this house I’m housesitting for 6 months …
• know that strength comes from adversity and wished it came from bubbles!

Then I gave myself the day off from dreaming and planning and making things happen.

I listened to my body, feelings, thoughts and intuition and rested.

Sometimes we just need to stop for while and not be the champions of our dreams and actions.

Sometimes we need to take some time to replenish our energy.

I went to bed and fell asleep and woke to the same day.

I’m not saying that I’m ready to take on the world [I'll leave that for tomorrow] but I am feeling a lot calmer and less stressed.

And, I don’t feel sick any more and my intuition tells me that all will be well eventually.

I went outside and saw the first daffodils and that made me smile.

I have friends visiting this week and next week and that made me smile.

Coco dog ran around me in pure joy at seeing me and that always makes me smile.

I’m smiling and tomorrow will be another day for dreaming, planning and action.

Today I rest.

Take good care of yourself

Liz

Hi Dreamers

I hadn’t written for a while, so I thought I’d drop in and give Liz a break.

I’m having something of a love/hate relationship with a site called TripAdvisor at the moment. If you haven’t come across it before, it’s the Lonely Planet of the digital age, except they don’t editorialise… it’s all crowdsourced.

I had such a bad experience at a restaurant in Bangkok a while back that I felt the need to vent (or as I like to think of it, give friendly advice to other travellers). While I was there I also posted a few good discoveries I’d made. Then a few months later I started posting some reviews of places in Johor Bahru in Malaysia, because its coverage on the site was so dusty that it made it seem like a sad whistle-stop of two factories and a bus station.

Not only did I give, but I received as well. I discovered the pleasures of crowdsourced travel and the question of “where should we go for dinner?” became an adventure again.

But then I had a crisis of conscience. While I certainly appreciated the sneak insights offered by others, what was I doing giving away my favourite travel secrets? Next time I go to that little cafe I know in JB that does the French Press coffee and the addictive Korean breakfast rolls, will it be over-run with tourists, iPads propped against the centrepiece, ordering the things I ordered and sitting in my chair?

I’m still not sure if it’s just selfishness, perhaps it is, but I like to think that what my crisis was really about was the death of serendipity. I didn’t like Lonely Planet back in my backpacking days (although I’d gratefully sneak at look at one from a fellow traveller whenever I got the chance) and I’m not sure I care for its modern substitute. I can hear its siren call, but I’ve been around the block and I’ve heard the sailor stories.

I wonder to what extent this crowdsourced attempt we make to eliminate accidents from our life makes our lives smaller? Should some things, perhaps, be left to chance?

In an insightful look at exactly that question, Life in Review: Crowdsourced Tastemaking and the Death of Serendipity author Ylajali Hansen quotes Guy Debord, presiding genius of the 1950s artist-revolutionary group The Situationist International. In “Theory of the Dérive, Debord writes:

“Among the various situationists methods is the dérive [literally: drifting], a technique of transient passage through varied ambiances. The dérive entails playful constructive-behavior and awareness of psychogeographical effects: which completely distinguishes it from the classical notions of the journey and the stroll.”

Basically, what Debord is recommending is a walk without purpose, embracing randomness and curiosity. He recommends “slipping into houses undergoing demolition, wandering in subterranean catacombs fobidden to the public, starting up conversations with various passerby” and generally embracing the infinite possiblities and experiences open to someone willing to trod untrodden ways.

I don’t advocate not doing a little research or trying to minimise risks, but I worry that as it becomes easier and easier to walk in other people’s footsteps, we settle for the predictable at the cost of the serendipitous. Often it’s accidents that form the tapestry of our memories, making our lives uniquely ours… not to mention the opportunities they might bring.

In the LifeDreaming Expedition, Liz does some fabulous exercises focused on listening to your body and understanding what different parts are telling you about decisions you are trying to make. She uses Heart, Mind, Body and Spirit as indicators. The Mind is a powerful friend, and it’s the one we tend to place the most emphasis on in our Western culture. It’s also the one I think is nurtured the most by crowdsourced reviews. We love to research and analyse, and we see it as the magical doorway to “right” decisions.

But what about “gut feeling”, instinct or just random attraction for no reason that we can understand? What about coincidence, happenstance and serendipity? If we try to push that out of our lives, then are we not only diminishing our own opportunities but also our own personal power?

I remember on the backpacker trail the hoards of travellers with their nose in “the book”, sitting in cafes that had long ago got lazy and let their standards slip, or squeezing into the last room of an overcrowded hostel while equally good or better ones lay empty only a few doors away.

The beaten paths in life are like that. Your risks are reduced, but I wonder at what cost?

=)  Marc

A couple of other great articles about the death of serendipity:

The Dangers of Homogenization. What Flavor is Your Tofu?
Jacques Vallee’s Stating The Obvious: I, Product

This mission is not for the fainthearted.

You need to be resilient, brave , imaginative and willing to give it your all.

Some of you may not return.

if you do not feel ready for this mission then read no further

We salute those of you who have chosen to accept this mission.

The Terms of the Mission

1. You do at least one thing every day
2. You need to create time and space of between 20 and 60 minutes a day
3. You concentrate on the mission only during this time … no distractions allowed

The Mission Goals

The 6 Big R’s

Relax
Recharge
Replenish
Revive
Reward
Reengage

The Mission Tactics

Each day you will choose to experience the 6 Big R’s on any of 4 levels for 20 to 60 minutes … as a minimum … and you can do it in small chunks.

Physical – walk, dance, sing, swim, eat, cook yummies, look, explore, lie down, run, smell, knit, sew, have a massage, create, build, play  … do anything physical  … take some lovely breathes and look around at things that delight you

Emotional – engage with yourself and remember good times … spend time with people who make you laugh … ring a friend or Skype …  stop and chat to people you know in the street … write a letter to yourself about the things you really like about your life and yourself … write 23 things you are grateful for in your life … connect with your heart … find things to laugh at

Mental – read, think, write, dream, explore … enjoy some mental stimulation … do a puzzle, play with a mindmap … write down a list of things you’ve always wanted to learn … ask yourself interesting questions and see how many intriquing answers come up

Spiritual – be quiet … listen to your intuition … be aware of everything you do… engage with whatever deity you worship … and if you’re a happy atheist then relax with yourself and connect with your inner power

These are only suggestions and as a highly trained agent we know that you will think of many ways to achieve the 6 Big R’s yourself.

In order to successfully achieve your mission you will need to be strong and resist all urges to fill the time with cleaning or tidying or finishing that last bit of paperwork.

You will be faced with numerous challenges as you move to achieve this dangerous mission:

• feeling guilty that you’re doing the 6 Big R’s and not something ‘productive’
• feeling like you don’t deserve to do the 6 Big R’s
• thinking that you don’t have the time or money to do any of the 6 Big R’s
• having other people demand your time and you not being able to say NO
• finding that the 6 Big R’s aren’t as easy as they look

Here at Mission Headquarters we believe in you … we believe you have the guts and determination to do the 6 Big R’s … to stay focussed on the mission.

Our Mission Headquarters Chief [001] will also be on the mission and plans to do the 6 Big R’s over the next 7 days.

001 is our inspiration as she tends to embrace the 6 Big R’s every day … regardless of the dangerous consequences to those around her.

This tape will self destruct in 60 seconds … we need you to let us know in the box below that you are willing and able to choose this mission.

Good Luck.

Click the Like button if you enjoyed this post.

Have you heard about the Law of Attraction?

It became a hit with that godawful book The Secret … I revere books … they are my magic world … and The Secret was the first book I ever wanted to burn.

It’s not that she doesn’t have some ideas … it’s the fact that she pretty much needed lots and lots of other voices to affirm her voice [there are LOTS of quotes from other people] … and after a while it all starts to repeat itself.

So … if you really really want something all you have to do is think about it and the Law of Attraction kicks in … it’ll come find you.

Hmmmmmmmmm.

In my Life Dreaming workbook [you can download it free at the front page] I talk about Imagination and Intuition.

I firmly believe in the power of a Clear Wishing … being very very clear about what’s important to you and what you want to create in your life.

You don’t wish for a House … you spend time clarifying what kind of home … rural or city … rooms … materials … land etc. You use your imagination to see yourself in the Home … relaxing … being with friends and family. You write it down … you refine it. You have fun seeing yourself in that future … whatever the wish.

And that’s where some people stop.

A dear friend told me a story about a relative who read The Secret and other stuff on the Law of Attraction … she spends her time imagining the future and pretty much stays at home … that’s it.

Now folks … if you’ve read The Secret and the Law of Attraction … stayed home imagining … and it all came to your door … then fair fecking luck to you [and don't get me started on Your so Lucky!].

If I could just sit at home and wish Life Dreaming into existence without any of the effort that Marc and I are putting in … yeh baby … sign me up.

Most of us have to GOYA to make our wishes come true.

GOYA?

Yeh … get off your arse.

Sitting at home wishing … watching shit on tv … eating crap … and wondering why things aren’t changing … ummmm … duh.

Clear Wishing is only one part of the whole Life Dreaming process that we’ll be launching in Feb 2011 with the LD Expedition online workshops … there’s all the fun of planning … gaining support and resources … dealing with fears … drawing on your amazing strengths … and taking all the steps to make it real.

Linking your words to actions is the key.

When the Clear Wishings are big [me moving to Bali from Ireland late next year] then there are a pile of actions to put in place … so far no one has come to my door and offered to do it all for me.

Being clear about why it’s important in my life to move to Bali really helps me focus … researching it helps … telling family and friends helps … asking for support helps … developing an action plan helps … imagining myself in Bali with Coco dog helps … writing about my fears helps … and these are all actions [and more] that I’m putting in place to make my Wishing come true.

Even when the Wishing is small [restart my Wii exercise programme by buying aa batteries for the wii thingy] there are still actions to be taken.

So … in the words of the great Elvis … a little less conversation a little more action!

Watch the dancing …. it’s a hoot!

MARC SAYS…

We weren’t a particularly religious household, but I’m sure it was a family saying around my home when I was growing up that “God helps those who help themselves”. That was taken to apply to everything from studying hard to not returning an empty water bottle to the fridge and turning off lights and fans when you left a room. [ Liz - I remember Dad walking behind us when we left a room saying 'is anyone in that room ... do the lights turn themselves off?' I still hear that voice when I leave a light on!]

It was a running joke at the time, but it’s one of those life lessons that serves you well forever.

We also drew the good queue number when it came to parents, and were blessed with support and encouragement in everything we did. The proviso, of course, was that we’d have to put in the work for it. No silver spoons in our house.

[Liz again - one of Dad's sayings has always stuck in my head. He used to say that he didn't care what we did ... if we wanted to dig holes for a living that would be fine ... as long as we dug the best holes that we could.]

But there’s another lesson I’ve learnt as an adult… which of course applied to my childhood as well, perhaps just less consciously.

Yes, you need to visualize… and you need to GOYA. When they say “opportunity knocks”, they don’t mean “at your front door, while you’re in your jammies doing nothing”. They mean while you’re out there, doing things that will help you achieve your dreams.

But, in my experience, opportunity doesn’t always look like you expect it to. It can be serendipitous, surprising, perhaps even course-altering. It can be mischievous… perhaps showing up in disguise or requiring that you leap a small hurdle (or two, or three) before it reveals itself.

I had my tarot cards read once and was told “while you look for this thing you won’t find it, but when you give up trying, it will find you”. I crossed her palm with silver and thought nothing more of it, but sure enough, it’s a lesson that’s repeated itself for me over and over again.

I love all the things that Liz has written above. True words all. But I wanted to add this little bit to the bottom, a little like the 5pt type you find on the packaging of medicine and sharp objects (“Do not operate these scissors if you are under 5 years old, drunk or psychotic”).

Wish and dream. Visualise and plan. GOYA. But don’t let it blinker you. Stay open to the world and all the mad serendipity it contains. Treat it all (and yourself) with kindness and joy. Because as long as you’re out there working towards your dreams, you might not need to find everything you need, it might find you.

That’ll be one piece of silver please.

=) best wishes
Marc

p.s from Liz – and as usual Marc puts the icing on the cake. I sooo agree with him … serendipity and synchronicity are 2 of my favourite words. That’s the paradox of Life Dreaming … we give you lots of fab tools … and … we ask you to stay open to all the mad, crazy & delicious opportunities that tip toe & dance into your life. Keep your Opportunity Radar open at all times.

Life Dreaming Activity

In what areas of your life do you need a little less conversation and a little more action.

Mine is exercise … that’s why I bought the aa batteries for the wii today … and start the exercise programme again tomorrow.

All my life I’ve been deeply fortunate to attract people who are Life Rebels … and as I get older it’s one of my life’s delights.

Like attracts like …  I’ve always been a little LR.

R – Reflect on what’s important in your life … give yourself the gift of time and space to explore what really matters to you.

E – Explore your dreams … use your intuition as well as your brain to help you make decisions … imagine living what matters.

B – Believe in yourself … listen to your fears and be brave enough to live what’s important to you anyway … build on the strengths and power that make you so fab.

E – Engage in actions that will make your dreams real … take a step … make a leap … just do something to honour the power of your dreams. Engage your ‘E’ Factors.

L – Live the promises you make yourself … give yourself permission to leap and learn and love and loll and listen and laugh.

There is so much I could write here … and … I decided to keep is sweet. There’s a whole lot of stuff in those 5 lines.

Life Dreaming Activity

Look at each letter and reflect on how you are living it now … and what you’d like to do to be an even more amazing Life Rebel.

Are there letters that you are doing/living better than others?