Life Dreaming

A neat paradox.

This one has been and will be my biggest challenges as I work towards getting me and Coco dog back to Oz in early 2012.

Getting back to Oz – that’s the Big Dream – obviously.

Now dear reader, I would happily loll and live in the moment if :-

• All the money I needed (€12,000 and counting) was in the bank
• Someone else tracked down all the info about transporting a dog across the world – and – sorted my New Zealand passport – and – did all the marketing for my workshops – and – launched Life Dreaming – and and and and

It would be easy peasy.

It’s not – never is – never will be.

That’s the kick in the arse of having dreams and not just drifting through life. You gotta work (and play) your sweet butt off to make things happen.

The last few months have felt really stressed and all because of – money honey.

My delightful life challenge is to find ways to make money in Ireland during a recession (feels like a depression) that has decimated my consultancy.

I’m no quitter so I’ve been developing ideas and trying to get things up and running. Very slow results but I have hope.

A few weeks ago I realised that most of my energy was focused on the future – planning, making lists, thinking about the next steps and worrying myself into a dither.

I wasn’t looking after myself as well as I could. I do love to eat as a comfort and you know I love my bubbles.

I started to feel totally overwhelmed, stressed, irritable and close to depressed. I was letting my thoughts and feelings rule me. The gerbils were running faster and faster in the cage.

That is not the woman I choose to be.

I stopped and explored what I was doing and what needed to be done.

This is what I asked myself

Work out what you want to do and mark what’s negotiable and what’s not – and then decide next steps.

Here’s what I wrote:

• I want to move back to Australia – not negotiable
• I want to bring Coco dog back with me – not negotiable
• I want to feel healthier and calmer – not negotiable
• I need money to move back – not negotiable
• I want to move back to Oz by the end of February 2012 – negotiable

As you can see, my dream is standing the test of time and it’s just the time frame I need to change to decrease the stress and earn the money – and do the thousands of things that need doing.

I am now looking at a move date of April/May 2012 and that has it’s own ramifications as I’ll need to look for short term accommodation from the end of Feb – but that’s something that will work out.

People have suggested I leave Coco dog here for 3 months and go to Oz and earn money. My gut tells me that I’d rather stay here with her and bring her across. Trying to sort someone to look after her has its own costs.

S0, that’s the big picture sorted.

How am I embracing living in the moment?

I’ve created and decided a few things over the last 7 days that have really helped me enjoy the day to day:

• Go Play – I walk Coco for 45 minutes every day. I laugh and throw the ball and just revel in her delight at being alive. She’s the zen mistress of living in the moment. The exercise is also fab for me and I just relax and take lots of deep breaths and keep throwing the ball for Coco.
• Shut the Feck Up - I’ve placed a moratorium on worrying about bloody money for 2 weeks and may extend it. When the fear rises and the Goblins sing – I tell them to shut the feck up – I’m doing the best I can.
• Look after my body – Over the last week I cut out all sugars, starches, carbs and alcohol. I was amazed at how my emotions evened out and calmed down – no anxiety or mood swings. I felt clearer and more able and my body got lighter (by 7lbs) as a result. I’m giving alcohol a miss for the next 60 days and loving my vegetables, fish, chicken and green teas. And it’s no hassle as I can already see the results physically and emotionally.
• Don’t give up - In terms of earning money I’m working every day to promote my workshops and 1 to 1 sessions and am applying for any kind of work that matched my skills. All this effort will reap some reward soon – I hope.
• Enjoy the details - In November I start creating the vids for the Life Dreaming Expedition and I’m tres looking forward to it. I’m also doing a self directed learning course on launching online products so I can be ready next year when we launch it all. I see all the actions I do everyday as having meaning and purpose – working towards my dream. I also see a lot of what I do as a kind of work/play and do the best I can in every moment.
• Ask for Help – I’m asking for help and support from friends, family and complete strangers. I’m asking for feedback on the Luxury Life Dreaming Voyage I’m creating for January. I’m asking/bartering time from a student artist to put my workshop flyers around her campus. I’ll keep asking and most of the time people want to help.
• It’s not always about me – I give my time to help and support others. Like every human being I can be tres self absorbed. Listening and supporting other people takes me away from myself and gives me perspective.
• Treat myself – I bought some second hand books and lovely bar of scented soap this week. Things that cost very little and give me great pleasure.
• Just Stop - I stop all through the day and  - breath in, look around, stretch the old muscles and tell myself it’ll all work out somehow. I revel in the now and relish the taste, texture and scent of things. It calms and delights me. Patting Coco dog always helps.

And when the details of the day to day look like tumbling down on me I

STOP

And take a look at the Big Picture Dream – me and Coco dog on the beach with my sis and time with all my family and friends. I also savour the moment I’m in right now.

New Adventures.

And here’s a little blast from the past – The Only Way is Up

This isn’t a fact… I haven’t done any research. But my gut feel is that one of the most common irks us adults have is motivation at work.

I’ve talked to a surprising number of people who hate their job, or just feel indifferent about it.

Maybe it’s because I’m a boy, but if I close my eyes and imagine what “life” looks like, I picture cogs all tickering away in harmony, a bit like an expensive watch. And if one cog isn’t tickering as it should, I imagine it all still working, but perhaps it doesn’t show the right time anymore.

I won’t keep flogging that metaphor… I know you get the idea.

If you’re thinking that something’s a bit off with your worklife, or if you’re a boss and have some influence over the worklife of others, then Dan Pink has done his research, and I guarantee at least one of his insights will surprise you.

Our good friend Mary Del Casale, who’s always a wonderful source of insight and positive stories, steered us to this video a while ago. Mary’s consultancy, mdc places group, does amazing work in Place Making, which is about recognizing and enhancing the meaning and vibrancy of the social and community setting that people spend their lives in. She’s also a fabulous writer with stories of her hometown and the communities and people she works with. And, she’s someone who truly does embody all the things that Dan Pink suggests go into “fulfilling a passion”. Stop by her site and say hi… it’s always inspiring and worthwhile.

What do you think? Is it really necessary to have a passion for what you do, or work for a company with a bigger purpose than profit motive? Or is money enough? Let us know in the comments… and please do share with friends by hitting the LIKE button.

About a million years ago I did a psychology degree … which was fine at the time.

I learnt a lot more about psychology through my work over 25 years with groups, communities and organisations in Australia and Ireland.

What fascinates me is how and why some people seem to be energised and engaged with their lives … and others … less so.

I was also interested in exploring why some groups and organisations seem to lose their way … get tired … seem to have lost their Vavavoom.

I love researching and reading so those questions led me to motivation theories.

I read a theory over 20 years ago that looks deceptively simple … yet it’s awesomely applicable to individuals and groups.

It’s called Goal Path Theory of Motivation.

I’m not going to go into who developed it and all the layers of the theory … because I forgot most of it!

I pulled together the core elements and used them all the time to help groups and organisations understand why they might be feeling lost, confused and unmotivated.

I’m like most people in that I like my theories to be fairly clear and easy to explain … and able to put them to practical use.

One day as I was writing/drawing the 3 core elements of the theory someone in the group said ‘it looks a bit like a fish’.

I looked at what I was writing and connected all the boxes and created the smiling motivation fish … and it’s been a very useful reflection and planning tool ever since.

Here’s a drawing of my motivation fish … yeh … gasp in awe at my design skills … not!

A fish has to keep moving to stay alive.

If you are feeling unsettled, confused, tired, unsure … then it could very well be because one of the 3 [actually 4 if you include intervening variables] factors aren’t clear.

Confusion is usually a signal that there’s a need for clarity.

Let’s have a look at each of the factors:

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