Life Dreaming

Mea Culpa my wonderful Life Dreaming readers … it’s been too long between posts … my damn life keeps getting in the way!

The last few months have been very very busy to the point where I kept getting sick with colds and coughs … and felt tired a lot.

When that starts to happen I know it’s time to stop … reflect … and make a few decisions about the next steps.

The activity over the last 8 weeks has all been about fab stuff:

• We had our Dublin Fashion Swap Shop Event in May – a ton of organising and an amazing day with lots of happy women
• I rewrote and reimagined the 8 Life Dreaming modules and am really pleased with the result. Thanks to Marc’s gentle feedback [he's a People Whisperer] I took the time to deepen the flow between modules and totally rewrote the last 3.
• I was [and am] immersed in an evaluation contract that has involved a lot of work and chatting to interesting people. I’m loving the work and the potential for the future of the programme I’m assessing.
• Pam and I began a Pop Up Shop 2 weeks ago in a new market. We were really pleased at the way we designed the space and women loved what we had on sale. Only problem was … we had to be there 4 days a week and footfall was dreadful.
• I spent quite a bit of time preparing a proposal for potential new work that still had more work to be done [unpaid].

On Sunday Pam and I decided to close the Pop Up Shop as the low footfall meant it wasn’t making any money and we’d stopped having fun … 2 of our key goals.

I felt a rush of relief as I’m so not a 4 day a week in one place kind of woman … specially when it’s not making money.

On Monday I had an important meeting with the CEO of a national Irish organisation about some work I’m currently doing and he asked me whether I’d be interested in doing some further transformation and action work with them.

When he had left I sat and thought about the work that could be coming up over the next 6 months and realised that in order to do it all well I’d have to work hours beyond what is healthy for me … I had to decide what stayed and what got left behind.

I made a risky decision then and there and withdrew from a potential contract. A contract I know I would have enjoyed.

And yesterday [Tuesday] I rewarded myself for all the thinking, reflecting and risky decision making by staying in bed all day yesterday reading trashy novels … wearing my sparkly bracelets … and sipping a glass of sauv blanc … and not thinking about anything.

Bliss.

I’ve learnt a few lessons over these last few weeks and months and I’d like to share them with you:

Be clear about why you’re doing something so you know when to end or continue - the Pop Up Shop was about money, fun and learning. We got 2 out of 3 and decided to end it because the money wasn’t coming in and we’d stopped having fun and we’d learnt all we needed. Too many people continue with things because they’re not sure of their goals … and … they are beset by inner and external chatter that says ‘don’t give up … what’ll people think … they’ll say I was a failure’.

Keep trying different variations of an idea – Pam sells the clothes online; has tried some markets in the country; a market in the city; the recent Pop Up Shop … and maybe … a Sunday Market.

Celebrate all the efforts in the process and not just the result - I made sure we celebrated all our efforts even when the money result wasn’t as good as we’d have liked. I celebrate the fact that we don’t just talk about ideas … we actually make them happen. It’s hard work so I really really place a lot of importance on recognising & rewarding effort.

Be clear about how you define success - if we only defined the success of all the work that Pam and I have done over the last 3 months in terms of economic profit … then we’d be abject failures. I have other profit indicators – creative profit; playful profit; social profit; community profit; learning profit. On all these levels we were a smashing success – we had a lot of fun … were very creative … learnt heaps … provided a service that made a lot of women happy … and still had some money to give to charity.

Be open to taking risks - nuff said

Listen to yourself when H,M,B,I are shouting and reassess priorities - I was getting sick, feeling exhausted and really stressed and into the beginnings of irritation and anger … so … time to stop and reassess. My health [mental and physical] is really at the core of my vibrancy and I was feeling like a shadow of myself this last month. I also know myself well enough that by last weekend I had to make a decision and open more time and space for myself. I can’t work 5 to 7 days a week and still be creative and engaged. So, Pop Up Shop goes – big relief. And my nagging feeling about the potential work was starting to make me jittery … I was focused on the fact that it was the only work on the horizen and I ‘had’ to get some money in and I did like the look of the work but knew it would eat a lot of time and energy over the next 6 months. My priority is getting Life Dreaming Expedition and LD launched within the next 6 months. And if I got the new contract it would either put LD to the backburner or I’d burn myself out trying to do everything. So, I decided to drop the potential contract.

You’ll know when you’re on the right track - the feeling of relief was like a huge truck and elephant had been lifted off me and I could breathe again. Knowing that I’d had the courage to turn down the new work and close the Pop Up Shop made me feel so happy – and my Intuition was happy because I’d listened … and my emotions and body are delighted because they can rest for a wee while.

Reward your courage and creativity - I gave myself yesterday to loll in bed and read trashy novels and drink a glass of sauv blanc and eat hamburgers and sleep … while wearing all my new sparkling bracelets. I believe that we all need these moments and spaces to recharge and celebrate and simply stop charging ahead. Today I’m celebrating by cleaning the house and taking Coco for a walk  and writing this post … feeling relaxed.

Rethink and redecision the next steps - The potential contract that I withdrew from is no longer an income option and I still need money. I’m taking time to look at what options I have and they’re looking good. There’s the possibility of 2 pieces of work that excite me. In September I’m going to start doing the Blogsite workshops again and I’m even thinking of designing a special Life Dreaming for Artists weekend [I've done professional 3 year artist plans with individual artist friends and they love them] as well as a Life Dreaming Voyage for anyone. And getting the LD Expedition launched is a major priority.

Look after yourself - Even when I was feeling stressed and sick I made sure I ate properly and didn’t drink any alcohol for a few weeks and went to bed and got 8 hours sleep. I didn’t berate myself when things weren’t going well … I looked for reasons and new actions and chose to stay fairly optimistic and hopeful. When my optimism waned and I found myself close to tears a lot … then I knew that my basic caring for myself wasn’t enough and I needed to stop, reassess and make some clear decisions.

Get support - I couldn’t have tried the Swap Shop and Pop Up Shop and all the other things over the last 3 months without other people … specifically Pam and Paul. I got to bounce about ideas; try something new; feel heartened and disheartened with my friends, some of whom were as closely involved with these activities as I was … we swam, sank and swam again together.

Loll - oh how I’ve missed my lolling over the last few months. Every day started to feel like it was all just action, action, action … and I’m not made that way! If I learnt nothing else from the last bit of time … I learnt that lolling [for me] is an integral part of my creativity and energy. I get back to my calm place and am able to imagine and create and write … and all my E Factors come back into play. Interestingly, I’ve realised that lolling is not lazy or unproductive … it’s an essential part of enabling me to create ideas and engage with the world. I need time and space to wander around inside my head … to create and explore new ideas … and just reconnect with what’s important in my life.

So there’s my Dirty Dozen learning from all the fab madness of my life over the last few months.

Life Dreaming Activity

Do any of my Dirty Dozen ring a bell for you?

Which ones would you use a lot?

Which ones would you like to use more?

Please let me know you’re still out there by leaving a comment and/or Liking this post.

I promise to write more often now that I’ve resorted a few things.

I’ve been thinking about Power & Passion a lot lately.

To me they are inextricably linked … with Passion being more powerful … if you get my drift.

You can have Power without Passion

Some people pursue position power for its own sake  because they define success/status in terms of some external locus of control. On the other hand one of my favourite CEO’s [Kerry Anthony of Depaul Ireland] is extremely passionate about her work and that engages not only her workforce but also everyone that meets her. She’s a CEO because it helps her deliver services to some of Ireland’s most marginalised people and not because she just wanted to hold a position of power.

Power is defined in Many Many ways

I’m not going to write a learned document about the different types of power [I'll leave that to a range of interesting academics]. There are a number  external forms of power – position, expert, charismatic & coercive are just a few. Then there’s what I believe is the most powerful of all the Powers – inner personal power … living your life authentically, purposefully and passionately.

Passion is always Powerful

I adore talking with passionate people … regardless of the topic [and yes ... I get that passion can fall over into obsession]. There’s an energy, enthusiasm & just in your face delight that exudes from them.

I remember chatting to a friends brother for hours once and after he left my friend came over and asked ”what could you possibly have found in common with my brother to talk with him for this long?”. ”Passion” say I. When we first started talking I asked him what he enjoyed doing in his life [yeh ... one of the light and fluffy topics!] and as he told me about car racing his face lit up … his body relaxed … and he chatted away.

Now I couldn’t care less about car racing  … but I really enjoyed listening and watching this guy tell me stories about his passion and how it fitted into his life.

Passion can make you money … or not

People think that passions should translate somehow into money … some form of income … and that is totally possible. I know many many people [including me and Marc] who earn money by doing  things they are passionate about.

I also know people [lots and lots of visual & performing artists] who don’t make a lot of money from their passion but they wouldn’t choose to do anything else.

It makes sense if you’re creating a business or a career that it be linked to some form of passion.

Life’s too bloody short to work at something you don’t enjoy.

It does take persistence and a range of internal and external resources … but it you want to earn some money from your passions … there will be a way. Just GOYA and look for the way.

Passion is defined by and defines your Purpose

I’m interested in how passion energises us to act and live our purpose.

Purpose comes from your need/want to live your life a certain way.

When you have clarity of purpose you find that it also engages your Passion … your enthusiasm … your expenditure of time, money and effort.

Passion manifests infinitely

Passions can be felt and lived in so many ways … in our heads, hearts, bodies and spirits.

I have a passion for thinking and learning and exploring ideas and writing  … so my head is constantly and delightfully engaged.

I have a passion for engaging my own and other people’s personal power … so my heart and spirit feel wonderfully challenged.

I have a passion for the whole experience of the scent and colour and texture of food and cooking and eating … so all of me gets to be delighted and excited.

I adore beauty in design and the landscape … so my body and heart feel alive.

You define your Passions

No one can define what your passions are … they can try but ultimately it’s up to you.

It takes courage to define your purpose and passions … often in the face of both opposition and support from people that love you the most.

Competence is not always an indicator of Passion

People may say that you’d make a great xxxx [fill in the blank] because you’re so good at it.

Just because you’re good at something doesn’t mean it’s your passion.

On the other hand if you’re passionate about something there’s a good chance that you’ll develop skills & experience [competence] in it.

I have always loved working with groups of people to help them create better places to work, live & play … it’s my Passion and I’ve become quite competent at it.

I also realised that after 25 years I was in a Rut of Competence. I still enjoyed the different work and always gave it my best … but the passion was waning.

I realised it was time to manifest the Passion & Competence in a different way … and Voila … Life Dreaming going global and online is my new focus.

Passion makes you Personally Powerful

There is no doubt in my mind that living and speaking and having the courage to be passionate makes you personally powerful.

You shine when you live your passion.

You are energised and enthusiastic when you live your passion.

You act as a role model and light of hope for other people when you live passionately.

You’re living authentically when you live your passion and purpose.

There’s no such thing as Too Much

This is the beginning sentence of a new post I’ll be writing real soon. Just for now I want you to ignore anyone that tells you you’re ‘Too Much’ because you are living with enthusiasm, energy and passion.

I refuse to participate in the Dulling Down of anyones life

I’ve been told I was Too Much for pretty much all my life … and frankly my dear … I don’t give a sweet feck anymore.

Life Dreaming Activity

1. What are you passionate about?

2. How do you feel when you live your passions?

3. What has stopped you from living your passions?

4. What has helped you live your passions?

5. Have your passions changed/transformed over your life?

What do you think about the link between Passion & Personal Power? I’d love to hear your thought so write me something below.

And if you enjoyed this post please Like it and Share it on your Facebook page.

[edmund dulac - dreams]

So glad you asked.

Life Dreaming is something we all do.

It’s those moments when you find yourself musing on … what do I want to do and be ? … what if ? … how about?

And too often we find ourselves caught up in the hurly burly of living … all the grains of sand on the beach … all the reasons we have not to dream.

Life Dreaming is something I’ve done all my life and it became particularly important when I moved out of my 20′s and into my 30′s.

I did a lot of work with communities and groups all over Western Australia … working with them to imagine their future … and what was helping and hindering them from creating that future.

A group of women asked me if I’d create something that would give them the space to reflect … dream … imagine … & decide what was important in their lives right now.

Initially I said NO NO NO … too busy … too this … too that …

And one of the women should get a medal for persistence … she just nagged and nagged and nagged … until I said Yes just to shut her up!

Life Dreaming was born.

We had a wonderful time … and I’ve done Life Dreaming many times over the years but not as my core activity. It felt so special to me that I just let it happen whenever.

In 2007 I wrote the Life Dreaming workbook as a gift for the people who did Life Dreaming sessions. My wonderfully talented brother Marc did the design and I wrote the content.

In 2009 he emailed me and suggested that I give the workbook away for free … and I did … and hundreds of people have used it and loved the whole process.

And the day after giving the LD Workbook away for free … Marc suggested [notice I don't say NAG! ... he doesn't nag ... he just gently and persistently keeps asking] that I take each of the Life Dreaming workbook sections and expand them into a big bodacious Life Dreaming Treasure Chest of delights.

I procrastinated [thy name is Liz] and he kept ‘suggesting’ … and I found reasons to be too busy to do it … and he kept ‘suggesting’ … you get my drift.

I eventually took myself and my dog Coco to a cottage and wrote all the Life Dreaming modules.

Then I had to type them up … and there was always a reason why I couldn’t … and Marc kept emailing gentle requests for the text so he could begin the design … and I found reasons to be busy … and he kept emailing until I did an all nighter and typed some of the best Life Dreaming stuff ever.

You know what bugs me about a lot of life coaching and personal development and courses?

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